What do you do on those hard days where you can't focus on anything except your baby...who is not with you? I am just so homesick to hold her again. I've been trying to stay busy around the house, wash bedding, do dishes, cook something, etc. but it doesn't stop my heart from feeling so heavy and weighed down. Does anything? I wonder if this is just one of those grief waves that hit and I just have to let it do its thing and ride it out. I usually feel better the next day. I sure hope so.
Someone told me when you feel like you just can't go on, go and serve someone. Well, I want to serve an angel, then. I went and looked at fabrics tonight and decided that on these grief days I was going to bust out the sewing machine and make some little bitty diapers for angels to wear. The thought of making something for an angel seems to lift my heart a little. It is heartbreaking to see diapers that small knowing what they will be used for, but that was my most favorite thing Tesslee had on. I just couldn't get enough of her little legs in that tiny diaper. It just looked so cute on her. I printed out the diaper pattern and can't wait to get started. So this is my game plan: My grief days are not going to be wasted, unproductive hours. I will channel all that negative energy into making treasures for other angel moms. I feel better, already.
Oh, Sara, I am so sad that you had to use one of the diaper sets, but also very heartened to know that it brought you some measure of comfort. I hope that you find sewing for other angel families that walk your path very very healing.
ReplyDeletexoxo
Megan