Letting Her Go

I was listening to the radio while we were waiting for my son's football game to start and the most beautiful song played. It hit me so hard that I scrambled for a pen. The lyrics were describing exactly how I feel lately about my Tesslee.

"Only need the light when its burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go

Only know you're high when you're feeling low
Only hate the road when you're missing home
Only know you love her when you let her go

and you let her go." - Passenger

It stuck with me all day, and I felt almost this connection with Tesslee. It's like this understanding between us that this new threshold in my grief of moving forward and beginning to put the pieces of life back together may seem as though I'm moving on to most, but between Tesslee and I we both know this is only a new page in our book. I am beginning to let her go. I'm beginning to embrace this new me, this new life, and I'm going to be OK whether I believe it sometimes or not. This has not been an easy week. And it hurts when the ones you love the most can't understand where you are when you feel you need them the very most. But with or without them being able to understand, life has proven to go on and I am beginning to be strong enough to bear this burden. This song represents all these thoughts that have been weighing in my heart lately. And I know Tesslee knows them too as she's seen me struggle, change my focus and create a game plan to get myself through until we are reunited.

Tonight I looked up the info on this song. It was no surprise to me when I saw the release date. July 2012. The month that will always be tender for us, Tesslee's due date.

Sometimes angels guide us to things that give us a seal that it came from them. A little "Hi, Mom, I know you are struggling and it seems that no one can relate to the pain you feel in your heart, but I know you are hurting, and that you find comfort in music, and this song is for us and our relationship. I am with you still. Smile when you hear this song. It's our song."

Passenger- Let Her Go
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBumgq5yVrA